Oh by the way, folks,
Today we celebrate a feast day in honor of Saint Maria Goretti. She's the patron saint of youth, young women, purity, and rape victims.
Yesterday nothing happened until evening, when we watched the fireworks that got rescheduled from the day before.
And now, folks, if you're standing in front of your national flag, wearing the uniform of your employer, holding an assault rifle in one hand and your Holy Book in the other hand, are you a patriot or a terrorist?
Well, is it an American flag or a Moozlamic flag? Are you wearing a Hobby Lobby cashier's apron or combat fatigues? Is your Holy Book a Bible or a Koran?
Isn't it sorta hypocritical to make a distinction?
Well anyhow, now it's off to our three-headed sky-zombie hallucination orgy, where we'll use green altar covers, Father D is gonna preach, and there's probably a few folks in the congregation who become emotionally disturbed because some other religions that're almost as strange as ours do it a bit different.
Signs of life